MySpace "A weird conversation that's worth sharing..." - Monday, January 30, 2006, 21:38

I'll be the first to admit that I have never had a good, strong relationship with my mom. I have a stronger bond with my dad. Well, given that yesterday was Chinese New Year, I felt compelled to call home even after I was supposed to head to bed. Hence the reason why I only got four hours of sleep last night.

Well, my dad was taking his usual afternoon nap, since I called too late. But my mom answered. And I honestly cannot recall ever talking with my mom for that long ever. It was funny though, cos I had a hard time understanding her with my limited Chinese vocabulary, and she had a hard time understanding my side of the conversation with a few English words dropped in here and there. LOL Anyway, somehow the topic of girlfriends and marriage came up. Surprise, surprise...

You'll have to pardon my mom, especially she's still old fashioned. We got into a heated debate about women. First, it is better for me to marry someone younger than me. It is somewhat tolerable if I marry someone who's a year or two older, but she preferred someone younger. Ha ha ha... I told her that some of the women I've dated in the past have been older than me, which is true. But I stretched it a bit by saying one of them was ten years older, and she wasn't pleased.

Second, she tried to convince me that I need to get myself a proper Chinese girl. Why? Because she thinks a Chinese girl will be better mothers and more caring and submissive wives. WTF?!? I countered and said that not all of my female friends who are not Chinese lack the potential to be good mothers and good wives. And I also said that I don't want a submissive wife, cos that's boring and unbalanced in a relationship. Then I pushed her envelope by adding that I have met many Chinese girls who are all about material wealth and status, and are so self-absorbed that they don't have the time nor skill to be a good mother, much less a good wife. She was a little bit dumbfounded, but admitted that I do have a point. Score!

Third, she said that I need to get married soon. Ha ha ha... Like I can see that happening! I told her that when I find the right person and I feel right about the girl, then it will be time. I joked that it won't be till my 50th birthday before I get married. She cried out, "Foul!" Hee hee hee... But in all seriousness, she gave me a deadline: 35 years old. Yeah right! I have hardly ever listened to her before, so I doubt I'll listen to her on this. Love is not a matter where you need to rush or jump into. If it happens, it happens. If not, oh well. Let the chips fall where they may. Lightning may strike. Right?

Finally, she was trying to convince me that it's okay to marry someone way younger than myself. Of course, I don't have an issue with that, but given my age, I don't see myself picking out a girl from middle school! You see, my mom was 20 when she married my dad at his nice age of 38. She told me that it's good to have that kind of a spread because sometimes she would see in hospitals or other public places where the husband and wife are both old and can't depend on each other, and that their lives are boring and sad when the kids are gone. Yes, to a certain degree, I can agree it can be like that. But I said that wouldn't it be nice to grow old together? I would feel burdened to have someone care for me.

It's funny, because before all this discussion with my mom, I have blogged just a few hours earlier that one of my biggest fears is to outlive the person I love and adore. Of course, in that sense, I would have to let someone else rob my cradle. Hee hee... But still, I think it would be nicer to grow old together instead of one more than the other. i don't know. That is still an opinion I cannot have at this point yet. But one thing for sure is that if I want to have the same age spread between my wife and I as my parents, I would have to be dating someone who is 10 years old right now. Ha ha ha... How warped is that?

Anyway, we talked more about other stuff after she realized that I was just aggravating her with my opposing views. Of course, I will take her suggestions under advisement, but I still stand strongly by the notion of letting love occur naturally, instead of rushing it. =)

Other than the funny thing last night, nothing really happened today. Work was boring as usual. I worked late, but bolted home, I mean, to the hotel, to catch my favorite show How I Met Your Mother in time. Only to realize that it was a repeat. Sheesh... I blew off work for a rerun. LOL But it's okay, cos 24 came on a mere 30 minutes later.

Hmm... What else... Someone I dated only once when I was in college emailed me today out of the blue. She told me that her boyfriend of three years have just left her. What? Let's recap... I was young and stupid. I went out with her on our first date, and decided that she was way out of my league and I got severely intimidated by her that I never went out with her ever again. We only maintained email conversations for a couple months before we never talked to each other. This was back in 2000. How freaking weird is that, to get an email after I pretty much snubbed her? Is this the time in my life where all my past catches up to me and haunts me?